1. |
The Shirt
03:26
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There is no shirt upon my back
That has not lost its style
And I could buy a new shirt tomorrow
And not be back for a while
There is no tooth inside my head
That will not soon decay
I’ll sing and shout as I pull them out
But I'll soon be on my way
There are no clothes in my laundry bag
That I could not throw out
I could buy some new clothes tomorrow
Ooh, you'd better watch out
I'm about to throw some out
I'm going down to Union Street
And in some trendy store
I'm going to by me a brand new suit
And I won't be back no more
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2. |
Piranha
03:37
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You’re a pretty little fish alright
With your teeth so piranha white
Whoo-ee, I could be
With a carnivore tonight
Silly as it may now seem
It was all about my self-esteem
But do you think that I would just stand by
As you picked my bones clean
So I will rise in the early morn’
By the cruel light of dawn
While the city sleeps and lovers creep
While mothers weep I’ll be gone
There ain’t no use in me looking back
Into those pools of midnight black
Clickety-clack goes the railroad track
No use in me looking back
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3. |
Irresolution Blues
04:14
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Like a bandit coming out of the sun
She said c’mon baby let’s have some fun
I know a way that I can make you smile – I said
I don’t know, honey, it’s been a while
She said, tell me – what you wanna do?
She said, if you’re unsure what to do
I’ll do a Google search for you
Half a second later, c’mon, give me a break – I got
Half a million more decisions to make
She said, tell me – what you wanna do?
I am determined, yes I am my own man
I am resolved, yes I am
I can choose, I can select
Without getting caught up in the cause and effect
She said, tell me – what you wanna do?
We went shopping but we didn’t buy squat
We’d only take it back whatever we bought
We’d watch a movie but we couldn’t agree
Who’s gonna choose the DVD
She said, tell me – what you wanna do?
C’mon baby it’s time to go
C’mon baby: yes or no?
I said I would tell you all of one voice
But yet again you’re giving me multiple choice
She said, tell me – what you wanna do?
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4. |
A Triangular Tuesday
06:03
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Somebody told me we’re better off safe than dead
But I see only one destination up ahead
Oh, I will not be undone
I will have my day in the sun
One day we’ll end up dying of nothing at all
We’ll all just fade away quietly somewhere down the hall
We won’t cost the taxpayer a cent
We know that his money will be better spent
So give a cigarette, pass me that bottle of wine
The only question pending is: your place, or mine?
Oh, tomorrow will come anyway
Let’s poke it in the eye today
Some people tell you this is practice for the real deal ahead
That you only really come alive when you’re dead
You know, the funniest thing about that show
Is if they’re wrong they will never know
A ginger man hiding away from the sun
Just in case he is constitutionally undone
Hey, screwed by the DNA
That’s not a rash you can rub away
Penelope said; “What are you doing tonight?”
“Oh, I’m too tired to go and pick another fight;
I’m going to get down on my knees
And beg for forgiveness, please.”
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5. |
Celtic Airs And Graces
03:02
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Misty-eyed and moody
A true Celt for sure
Bellicose and broody
Genetically pure
She can play the fiddle
Like you’ve never heard before
Hey, diddle-diddle,
Play for me some more
She is sponsored by the
Secretary of State
A guardian of my culture
Isn’t that just great?
She’s talking Gaelic to the tourists
Over in Portree
You can catch her at the ceilidh
In deepest Dundee
I’m told that she’s living
Out upon some rock
Holding back the ocean
And turning back the clock
I hear she comes here
From time to time
If our paths should ever cross
I’ll try to make her mine
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6. |
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A caterpillar was crawling across my wall
Doesn’t he know just how small?
I guess it’s another tough one to call
Oh baby, you can kick me out the door
And I will never darken your door no more
I bought a two-way ticket, for sure
I got a message from the Inland Revenue
Politely asking me for remittance due
The next message wasn’t so polite
I got a letter begging me to take a loan
I was offered a holiday on the ‘phone
All these kind people just can’t wait
The caterpillar made it off the wall
I guess he just didn’t know how small
I hope he makes it, get wings and all
The wind blows a flurry across my eyes
There’s a certain light in the skies
There’s a place on the hill where I can sleep
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7. |
Blunder In A Minor
04:36
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I was sitting with my guru
He told me how it’s got to be
I’ve got to give up my home to the lost and lonely
And they will give up the streets to me
I was consulting with my consultant
He said “It’s all biochemistry;
Take one of these before you have your breakfast
And another one after your tea.”
Here’s one for the taxman:
Money doesn’t fall off trees
What matters most is the cheque’s in the post
Now stop moving the goalposts, please
Here’s one for the ladies
Sitting in your four-by-fours:
Take it on a trip to the Gaza Strip
And stop knocking dents in my car door
I went drinking with my best friend
I knew that he would empathise
Then at half-past-eight he said “It’s getting late
And you’re getting that funny look in your eyes.”
I went talking with the First Man
He said “Knowledge doesn’t grow on trees.”
I said ”I like the cut of your jib, could you spare me a rib?
I am fresh out of company.”
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8. |
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Don't you wish you had a star
You could sail to through the blue
Away from this cruel planet
That gravity holds you to?
Don't you wish you had a star
Far above the cloudy gray?
You could be sitting so pretty
In the middle of the Milky Way
Don't you wish you had a star
Deep in the speckled black?
Five, four, three, two, one, zero
And you won't be coming back
I'm going to buy me a telescope
And I'm going to point it to the sky
And that is how my life will end
With Heaven in my eye
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9. |
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Why do you look so left and lost?
Let me hazard a guess
Because you've been so self-engrossed
Am I right, more or less?
You know how it is
Your try your best
You get a kick in the shin
You get a kick in the...
Keep on trying, you've got to keep on trying
You've got to keep going on
Over and over ‘cause once it's over
It's over and gone
There is no second chance
There is no last dance
Now won't you come home with me
For the fun it it?
See-saw Marjorie Daw
Johnny's got a new wife
Now she won’t give you the time of day
Just the time of your life
Sacre Bleu!
I was only saying "Hello"
But if that's how you feel
You can spin on it!
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10. |
Rove A Little
02:48
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I'll meet you in the open I'll meet you under cover
I'll meet you anywhere that your brother won't discover
‘Cause I like to move around
Love to rove a little
Step on some other ground
Polygamy, Monogamy is all a bunch of phooey
Don't you get romantic, don't you get all gooey
I don't want to fall in love
I'm a grown up man, good God above
Oh, beauty is skin deep
And you've got all I need
Yes it's all I need
I'll meet you in Hell but you know it might be quicker
If I meet you at the bottom of a bottle of liquor
Don't you try to tell me I don't really mean it
Or what true love can do: I've already seen it
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11. |
The Captain
05:27
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Who is the captain?
And who is the engineer?
Who has the charts?
Who knows these parts?
Who has the eyes to steer?
Who is the captain?
Who is the navigator of our fates?
The sea is so high
I can hardly see the sky
Which is blacker than the jack of spades
Who is the captain?
Who will be there when the eighth bell tolls?
With all these accidents
Who has the confidence
To save our souls?
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12. |
Waiting For Krzysztof
05:09
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While she was waiting for Krzysztof
While she had time on her hands
She mused on the passing of steam
And the far Morecambe sands
And the grass that is bent by the winds
On the dunes all day
While she gazed out on the platform
In the pools of the cold neon light
She dreamed of the crying of gulls
And the stealth of the tide
Nobody walks these long sands
Without their leave
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